No one to trust but me

Dairadium wrote:If you're wondering that's the title for my fanfiction (the name of this topic). I'm trying to become a novelist and I thought what better way to start then to write some fanfics. It's going to have multiple chapters and possibly a pairing (but don't get your hopes up). The story is a cross between John Carpenters 'The Thing' and Teen Titans (well no duh. XD) so it's a horror fic.
I'm putting it all up on my fanfiction account so I'll put the link down below, hope you all like it! :D (please review it if you get the chance, I'd really appreciate it.)

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5115653/1/No_one_to_trust_but_me

Dairadium wrote:If you're wondering that's the title for my fanfiction (the name of this topic). I'm trying to become a novelist and I thought what better way to start then to write some fanfics. It's going to have multiple chapters and possibly a pairing (but don't get your hopes up). The story is a cross between John Carpenters 'The Thing' and Teen Titans (well no duh. XD) so it's a horror fic.
I'm putting it all up on my fanfiction account so I'll put the link down below, hope you all like it! :D (please review it if you get the chance, I'd really appreciate it.)

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5115653/1/No_one_to_trust_but_me

aetitan414 wrote:

Dairadium wrote:If you're wondering that's the title for my fanfiction (the name of this topic). I'm trying to become a novelist and I thought what better way to start then to write some fanfics. It's going to have multiple chapters and possibly a pairing (but don't get your hopes up). The story is a cross between John Carpenters 'The Thing' and Teen Titans (well no duh. XD) so it's a horror fic.
I'm putting it all up on my fanfiction account so I'll put the link down below, hope you all like it! :D (please review it if you get the chance, I'd really appreciate it.)

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5115653/1/No_one_to_trust_but_me

please write more!! I really liked it!

Dairadium wrote:

aetitan414 wrote:

Dairadium wrote:If you're wondering that's the title for my fanfiction (the name of this topic). I'm trying to become a novelist and I thought what better way to start then to write some fanfics. It's going to have multiple chapters and possibly a pairing (but don't get your hopes up). The story is a cross between John Carpenters 'The Thing' and Teen Titans (well no duh. XD) so it's a horror fic.
I'm putting it all up on my fanfiction account so I'll put the link down below, hope you all like it! :D (please review it if you get the chance, I'd really appreciate it.)

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5115653/1/No_one_to_trust_but_me

please write more!! I really liked it!

I'm writing the next chapter only it's taking me awhile (sort of got writers block). Can't say when it'll be done, but I'll update this when the next chapter is up.

Well, uh...The Thing is one of my all-time favorite movies, so I like the concept here, but...to be perfectly honest, your writing style really needs a lot of work. There are grammatical, phrasing and structural problems with virtually every sentence. The Titans' dialogue and behavior are also not very in-character. Finally, the sudden and seemingly accidental shift to bold type partway through is an eyesore.

The most useful advice I could give you, if you're serious about improving your writing, is to first do a lot more reading -- find others whose writing style appeals to you, and study their work.

And after that, proofread your own material thoroughly before posting it.

Cylor wrote:I posted a review, but I'll also repeat what I said in it here, if you or anyone else wants to discuss that further.

Well, uh...The Thing is one of my all-time favorite movies, so I like the concept here, but...to be perfectly honest, your writing style really needs a lot of work. There are grammatical, phrasing and structural problems with virtually every sentence. The Titans' dialogue and behavior are also not very in-character. Finally, the sudden and seemingly accidental shift to bold type partway through is an eyesore.

The most useful advice I could give you, if you're serious about improving your writing, is to first do a lot more reading -- find others whose writing style appeals to you, and study their work.

And after that, proofread your own material thoroughly before posting it.

Dairadium wrote:But thanks for reading it and posting a review, even if you had nothing good to say about it.

Cylor wrote:

Dairadium wrote:But thanks for reading it and posting a review, even if you had nothing good to say about it.

Well, look at it this way: I realize it's your first attempt, and if I thought your ideas and writing style showed no potential at all, I wouldn't have bothered reviewing. I'm curious to see what you could accomplish in time.