Corrupt a Wish

Granted but it's not sticky

I wish our alarm wouldn't go off in the middle of the night so much...

Granted, but it constantly goes off during the day.
I wish my feet weren't cold.

Wish granted. Now, You have no feet.

I wish I had a really cool top hat.

wish granted but the hat falls into a mud puddle and then a flash flood comes and then a storm and the world implodes

i wish i had water

Wish granted, but you and your fish are now allergic to water
I Wish i could read minds

Granted, but only when you are licking the back of their head.

I wish technology would advance faster.

wish granted but aliens steal it all

i wish for this forum to stay alive forever

Granted but you die

I wish I could learn things faster

Granted but you learn things too fast and your brain can't keep up, leaving you brain dead. I wish I had another day off of work.

granted but the extra day you get off of work is when the space pandas from mars decided to blow up the earth such mean pandas

i wish i could live forever

Granted but you watch all of your friends and family die, your body rots, and you live alone... forever

I wish I could focus better

Granted, but by being focused on everything and anything, you will never sleep- fall into a depressin and eventually die.

I wish I could be myself.

Granted, but you discover an unknown part of yourself that you never knew was there and she comes out and steals your computer.

I wish I had a baby penguin

granted but the penguin is actually me in a disguise i bug you for a million years

rofl had to relate that to me somehow rofl pingus ftw! rofl XD

i wish none of my friends died either rofl XD

Granted, they kill you.

I wish J1 would stop typing rofl

Granted, now everyone else starts typing rofl. Oh god, shoot me now, rofl!!

I wish I could chew gum without the fear of my tooth falling out

Wish granted butyour tooth falls out.

I wish everyone had a stronger immune system.

Granted, but then grems mutate to rule the world.

I wish 'Dora the Explroer' fell off a cliff.

granted but now shes in your backyard! rofl

rofl everyone hates that word for some reason rofl XD i wonder rofl why rofl people rofl hate rofl so much rofl! XD that was an more than usual btw rofl XD seriously all my friends tell me to stop but its what i use i am me if you were serious rofl

i wish my friends wouldn't kill me rofl would they even be my friends then? rofl XD

They don't kill you just chop off your fingers

I wish parellel parking was easier =/

granted but now everything else is harder

i wish they didn't chop off my fingers rofl

Granted, but then would be burried alive.

I wish someone murdered Justin Beiber(painfully).

Granted but then he becomes martyred and his fans form 'the cult of Beiber' which in turn becomes a powerful religious sect, influencing many facets of society from education to global politics, including their own national holiday celebrated on the day of Justin Beiber's birth.

I wish there was less work to do to get the Dice Game ready, and/or more time to do it in.

Granted but after all your hard work and all the time you put into it, no one wants to play

I wish I had better self control

That would be horrible and I would kill you all.

Granted but you're so self controlled and neurotic that you don't allow yourself to do anything fun ever, survive on a steady diet of nutrition pills, and spend at least 3 hours every day reading classical literature and working out. Your life is one of schedules and repetition, enjoy.

I wish blue was a flavor of cake.